Soap specially formuated for your arse

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Soap, specially formulated just for your arse.

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VLS (Very Large Sausage)

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 People along the river Avon in Stratford, U.K. were astonished at the sight of a VLS (Very Large Sausage) making its way up river, knocking boats out of the way and in some places becoming stuck so that it had to wriggle its way free. The police were called to deal with it but they knew it was hopeless because VLSes don't take orders from the police; they don't have to. Still the officers tried. "This is the Stratford police and we order you to come on shore!" The VLS just kept slowly cruising by. "VLS, if you don't come ashore immediately, you will be arrested for disobeying an order and for resisting arrest!" "Sure. And where do they think they'll put the handcuffs," the VLS chuckled to itself. "They have no idea who they're dealing with, don't even know me, and they're not very friendly." As the VLS continued to float upriver, the police moved about a mile ahead to set up a large net across the river. Eventually th...
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Delving into the story about Little Bo Peep

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  The poem about Little Bo Peep was written in 1805, and as reported, she was short, not little. That makes sense because it's unlikely a little girl would be tending sheep. The name 'Bo' intrigues me. I had a friend known as 'Bo' whose name was Robert. It's possible, then, that the person we think of as a little girl, was actually a short male  named Robert. Little Robert Peep has lost his sheep. That makes more sense but if Bo Peep was actually a short male, why was he posing as a little girl? Could he have been a transgender around the turn of the nineteenth century? Yet it's only well into the twenty-first century that so many are coming out as transgender. I have, now, decided there will be no more renditions of Little Bo Peep in my home. Anyway, onto the subject of a mouse running up a clock: Was its name really Hickory Dickory Dock? And who would give a mouse such a name?
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